Stories and bonding with others
The best way to bond with someone is through stories of your own experience and telling what has gone on throughout your own life as a person. Now as people, we have many stories, which we can use for creating that mutual bond with someone. It is a matter of being able to talk about your experience and getting the person to understand where you are coming from. When you share your own story with someone, you are bonding with him or her.
Yet sometimes there are people who we are unable to bond with, as there is no real common ground with that person. Your story does not resonate with them in some way, for each person we have to be able to have a story, which will touch the person. When we do not then the relationship is not easy at all.
We have to find some way to relate with the person. Ok a story…. When living with mum (parents are divorced) I was with siblings and it is a battle to express yourself. Some people want it quick and to the point, yet they want it their way… you say this is the requirements…. Such as, it has to be healthy and they turn around and say I do not do healthy. Now you can use that story to express to others about some people’s resistance to you changing your diet. Yet you also need to take ownership of that yourself that you will make those changes too. Sure people need to realise it is your choice how you eat and even your own diet. However, you are unable to force someone to cook a meal, which is healthy when the person refuses to do such. Ultimately, you have control of how you eat as a person though.
I am sure within each of our lives we each have a number of stories from experiences, which we have had that will allow us to relate to others in some way. It could be a story such as the above, it can be a story about what happened in high school to you, about your former relationships and the lessons they have produced, about going after the wrong types of people when searching for your future partner.
We all bond in some way through our stories as a person that we talk about what has been going on and relate to our mutual experiences. Our stories will give us life experiences and show that we have been through something a challenge or simular and come out the other side alive and well. We can express these stories to others as a person as we go along to build the relationship with that person.
Every experience we have as a person is designed to teach us a lesson; we have to find that meaning. We also need to have our stories short and to the point that we do not ramble on and bore the person. Therefore, we need to be quick. That is the best way, the longer you spend getting to know someone the better. Sure, you can build a relationship on spending hours chatting on the phone, yet it can also be easier getting to know that person face to face.
Ok yes there are going to be people who you have no common bond with as a person that can happen.
I would like to thank my wonderful amazing mentors Michael Dlouhy, Ken Klemm and Willena Flewelling for their wonderful inspiration, guidance love, support and assistance.
Wishing you the best in love, life, health and huge hug
Wishing you the best in health and love and big hugs
Jenny and Ben
Mentors with a servants heart
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