Blog • Coach Freedom and Friends

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Having the courage to follow through with your promises is a big thing. People sometimes do not realise that this will at times be a test; when you have to commit or fore fill some promise to another person. Yes at times you not want to make do on those promises and other people may plainly forget about them, it takes courage to say look I need more time. I haven’t got to this yet I shall do it I have had a bit on my plate lately, sure at times things do come up and that is ok. Yet when someone does not follow through on their part of a promise it does not help at all.

Say someone suggests they will help with a project and when the time comes around to help they are busy. You have fore filled you part of the deal, however they do not remember or say anything about such. This happens a lot, however when someone is genuine with their promise and commitment they will make it happen no matter what. They may have to say look can I delay this and you go from there. It’s a matter of being faithful to those commitments and promises which you have made to someone no matter what happens. Ok yes at times you may need to take a raincheck or say look can we do it some other time. However when this happens a number of times it can really affect any friendship or relationship.

The more the person lets you down the more it becomes harder to trust them as a person. This is how friendships or relationships are destroyed, the more someone doesn’t follow through on their word the more it says I do not know that you should trust me to the other person. Yes there may be genuine reasons, when someone does not offer an alternative then it makes the person who made the request feel hurt when they are continually let down by that same person. When you are someone who does such then it’s best to say I do not think I can do that. Not say yes and forget or not follow through as it only hurts the friendship. This especially happens when you say yes to something and then suddenly pull out, ok yes there are good reasons for doing such. It really depends on how good the friendship / relationship before someone will say no that’s enough and put their foot down.

Think about it. Are you someone who constantly says yes and then does not follow through, are you someone who will say look I am busy is it ok to do it later, do you keep to your commitments or promises. That’s a big thing as it can say a lot about your character as a person and even how much you respect, admire and love that person. When someone continually breaks promises it is a sign of a lack of respect for that other person. Yet when they ask to delay it means they want to do it, when they do what is asked it suggests they respect you as a person.

Want to know more? Just ask. You can call or email me.

Want to learn more about relationships http://bdrake.successin10steps.com/?mad=52669 information is available from this eBook.

Be mentored for free Ben Drake

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A very powerful day.

02/02/2011

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| Mentor Ben Drake

| 11:16 am

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One of the most powerful days in any person’s life is the day they say I am going for that goal and I am not going to give up on it. This what I am going to do and I do not care what barriers you put in front of me, nothing is going to stop me no matter what from achieving my goal. You can throw whatever you want at me, however it’s not going to work, you are not going to distract me from my goal. Like it or not nothing you do will work. This is the day you are saying I am in with no excuses, no matter what happens. I am 100% committed to do doing this no matter what, I am in for the good and bad times, you see often when people quit it’s just prior to some form of success. They walk away from what they are doing; just prior to their success; owing to someone saying well this is not working why do you continue. Quite often the person who has provided the advice is ill advised and does not understand at all. That person may not have all the facts or information you have.

I can remember a time when I quit and walked away from things owing to people not having all the facts. It is best to go with what you know is right and to say well this is what information I have and take it from there. There are people who will try and tell you why you can no longer achieve your goals and dreams. They use a number of excuses to tell you why you are unable to achieve that goal. These are learned behaviours, sometimes a person needs to spend years in preparation just to become the person they were destined to become. That person has to learn their lessons and what skills are needed for their future. Personally I have spent the last 3 years building the skills needed for my future, is their some skill which you missing that could move you onto the next level of your own success.

Success is different for everyone, what one person sees as success is completely different what another sees as success. For some people it’s that nice home, that nice car, the big screen TV, for others it is the family, spending time with their family and kids. Being able to be there for them no matter what happens. Each person is different as to what they see success as. Yet when you commit to something saying no matter what I am going to do this it really makes a very powerful day. As you know that it’s what you want from life nothing more. I know when I have made a commitment to something I have always followed through no matter what.

The power comes from saying no matter what this is going to happen. You can test me yet I shall achieve this goal no matter what. The tests are often to see just how determined you are to achieve that goal. When you quit it’s because you are not fully committed or do not fully want that goal.

Want to know more? Just ask. You can call or email me.

Want to learn more about relationships http://bdrake.successin10steps.com/?mad=52669 information is available from this eBook.

Be mentored for free Ben Drake

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Programing yourself for success

01/02/2011

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| Mentor Ben Drake

| 10:46 am

In order to be successful in life you have to program your mind to expect that success. What do I mean by this, a person must prepare themselves to be successful and to expect that success will come. The best way is to program your mind saying I can do this, I can achieve this goal and I am not going to listen to those negative people who give me all the reasons why that goal is not possible to be achieved. I have heard a few of them in my time, well meaning friends, colleagues, associates etc. will turn around and say well that’s too hard, you are not good enough, it costs too much. That is all the result of their programming. This has happened at some point during the person’s life.

Now the best way is to ask yourself how can I achieve this goal, what can I do to turn this goal into reality. You also need to know what is motivating you to achieve such. Once you know why and what you want to achieve, then the best thing is to go after that goal. You see it all the time some people will be wanting to sleep with someone only for that notch on their belt, yet the people who are out there and not prepared to give such up without love well they are people who have their goals set and know what they want. These people stick by their goal of not sleeping with someone until they are in love or married.

Now to achieve that goal a person needs to literally expect that the goal is going to happen and that they are going to be successful. Any doubt in a person’s mind does not help, so what you need to do is make it so that you do what is known as your self-talk to yourself. Take what you want to be in your life and write it out as if you already had such. What do I mean of your goals could be a relationship so you say yourself “I am in a relationship” at least 100 times a day. I know I say my own self-talk to myself a lot more than that, I listen to it at night when I am asleep and when doing things throughout the day. Doing your self-talk and programming your mind helps keep those bad thoughts out of your mind, the more you listen or do your own self-talk the more you are pulling that goal towards yourself. As the more you believe the goal and hear it the stronger it becomes programmed on your mind.

When it’s programmed into your subconscious mind you are drawing the goal to you. This is something that I’ve seen happen in my own life of recent weeks, drawing that goal towards me. It’s not just about programming for a relationship you can do this with anything at all. My personal self-talk goes for 20 seconds and plays all night at least which is over 1400 times at night, it plays in my car and when I am busy with tasks. The more I listen to my self-talk, the more it will draw the events to me. When you program your mind expecting success you draw it to you, sure it may take time work and patience; however when you work at it the prize is yours. It just needs work time and patience.

Want to know more? Just ask. You can call or email me.

Want to learn more about relationships http://bdrake.successin10steps.com/?mad=52669 information is available from this eBook.

Be mentored for free Ben Drake

Letting go of those who you love

31/01/2011

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| Mentor Ben Drake

| 11:39 am

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In life the hardest thing can be letting go of someone who meant a lot to you. Sometimes it’s just that not easy at all, the people who come into our lives are there either for a short or long time however they are always there to teach us something. Weather it’s about ourselves or to help us improve who we are, there are people who love us for who we are and others who just can not accept who we are and are constantly trying to change us. They are telling us why we shouldn’t achieve a goal. Although you may love them it’s hard, letting go of them in the way of love is not a very easy process.

Yet sometimes it has to be done, what you need to do is say goodbye in your own way to them. Sometimes its easy when the person passes on or dies, other times it’s necessary to say they are never going to change. They will not ever be what I want them to be as a person, the hard part is that some people can come from a number of very bad emotions because they do not want to lose that person. Some people will use fear tactics, jealousy, revenge, greed and anger to justify why the person should not go. This can be for many reasons, however letting go of someone who you love is about saying they made their choice.

When a person dies it can be hard enough, yet each relationship needs grieving. Sometimes it’s not very easy at all to lose someone, yet everyone has their own process. You need to work out how you let go of those who you love.

Want to know more? Just ask. You can call or email me.

Want to learn more about relationships http://bdrake.successin10steps.com/?mad=52669 information is available from this eBook.

Be mentored for free Ben Drake

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Growing up without being shown love

28/01/2011

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| Mentor Ben Drake

| 11:21 am

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One of the hardest environments to grow up in an environment where there is abuse. Unfortunately it’s an environment where some people grow up, the environment where the parents do not love themselves; so they show the child no love, which hurts them later in life. It makes it hard to be able to create friendships and feel safe with others; it makes it hard to even love yourself. What you need to do is learn that it’s not your fault that your parents were unable to love themselves and therefore showed you no love. You grow up being told what to do, what to say, what to think. Hmm again this leads back to programming.

So what you need to do is learn to love yourself despite the environment and upbringing. When you are able to leave awesome, however the hardest part is when you are unable to leave through fear or lack of funds. Now when someone has placed fear inside you from a young age making you feel worthless or worse. Then it does not help; when someone is unloved the lock off a lot of things, it’s hard as they sublimate their feelings in a way. I know that’s what I did, programming does not help. You get to the stage where you are pleading for help however it does not help, so what you need to do is learn to let yourself be lovable and to feel loved as person. The best way is to start by saying “I like myself”, when you start saying such to yourself and say it without problems, then you are able to say “I love myself”.

It may take a bit of work to say hey I love myself. Yet when you can love yourself you start having a chance to rebuild your life again. Can you say to yourself 10 times without a problem I like myself or I love myself? That’s a big question. You have to say such to yourself constantly, no matter what and program such into your mind that you love yourself. Despite your influences you love yourself. Many people turn to different things owing to not loving themselves. That is the thing; many addictions are because the person may not love themselves. They are writing themselves off owing to not loving themselves as person.

Want to know more? Just ask. You can call or email me.

Want to learn more about relationships http://bdrake.successin10steps.com/?mad=52669 information is available from this eBook.

Be a mentor with a servants heart Ben Drake

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