Author: Mentor Ben Drake

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Right now I have a lot going on I am working my business and have some great friendships. I need to sort things out or to say well I am not going to take this anymore it's time for me to move on, it means building myself to the level where I am a great person and can care for another help them through thick and thin. I know in my life there are a lot of people who I have to help, right now I know that with some I need to be there and just listen say ok lets work through this. I know personally that I will be a stronger guy from what I have been through in the last few years. So let's think about my victories and not my losses.

I am a marine radio operator

I run my own business

I have a great life

I have found some wonderful friends

There are so many things that I could count as victories and not see things as being a victim. I have to deal with the rubbish that is going on in my own world right now, for me I am going to achieve many great things in my life and I need to build myself up. It's time to learn more about myself and to become a better person. To develop those skills that I need to have for my own personal future and to live a great life. I have to sort a few things out prior to moving in the direction I need to; I have to work on a number of things first. The time will come when it is meant to. For me it's about no longer letting the negative vibes from family and other sources get to me. It's about saying well that's your problem and I am not going to accept it. You have to realise the time comes when you need to say well let's do this it's what has to happen.

Relationships in any area of life you need to create relationships, there are relationships at work, at school, at home, at the sports club; they are in so many places. We have relationships all around us; some people expect a instant relationship. Yet relationships do take time to build, they need to be able to grow. Without creating a relationship with someone there is no foundation for anything further, it's like saying ok this is all we are going to do and proceeding from there. It is like the people who spend the night together and then go their separate ways, that is not a good relationship you are saying well ok thanks bye.

For me being in the relationships business it's about getting to know people who they are and what makes them a person. It's about not judging someone and learning ok this is who they are as a person, coming from a family where one person says I do not want any dependants anymore. That is why they have sat there for years and pushed people away, they do not anyone to depend on them or need them for any reason. This is a very bad attitude as it often says well I do not care about you, the hard part is what do you do when someone you love e.g. a member of your own family is such. Well the only thing possible to accept the person for who they are.

This person may or may not change however they have to want to change themselves no one can force them to change. In life we all build relationships, there are people who want to control others, who need to control others and their lives are often ruled by it's about me. There are people who serve others and give from the heart they will do anything for another person, yet these people need to learn to not take on another person's rubbish. It surprises me the amount of emails or messages I get saying hey I want a relationship with you and the person is looking for the instant relationship. They want you to be more then friends right away. That is not me it takes time to build such.