Mentor Ben Drake • Coach Freedom and Friends

I have been getting to know myself better lately, why I was so prepared to spend 12 months in China working. As well as many other things, however also about myself as a person, the type of guy I am. Ok what type of person am I well first I need to look at those things I enjoy and go from there.

So what is there that I enjoy and like to do?

I enjoy giving people hugs, being supported and encouraged, I enjoy being a volunteer (I have been volunteering since I was 17), I enjoy teamwork, helping people, walking along the beach, swimming, the mountains, the view from the mountains, I do not have to have all the stuff however I do appreciate having my things in a good state e.g. usable and not falling apart, I like clean and tidy not a big mess.

So essentially what I am saying is that to me I enjoy being around people or having that social contact daily. Being around people, to me social contact can be email, phone, text message, face to face or simular. I am someone who loves socialising and also is a romantic; I have seen that side of me come out quite clearly lately. It's the guy who loves writing poems, who cares for those who are dearest to him, who will do anything for that person, he loves them deeply. Walking the beach of the world and travelling with them having an enjoyable time would be just so wonderful.

Honestly I love my friends; a number of them are just so amazing and have been awesome and amazing friends to me. I have got to meet some great people via social networking; some people get fed up with me and the questions, with me wanting to know them. However it's their problem not time. I enjoy those friendships.

Anyway I have some more questions which I am answering. They are as bellow.

What would you do if you were given 1 day to live, 1 week to live, 1 month to live, 6 months to live, 12 months to live, with unlimited time, with unlimited money? Only you can answer these questions yourself, however the thing is often these help a person to discover who they really are as a person. Sure a person will crack from extended stress however there is nothing that can be done about that.

If you want to learn more about relationships http://bdrake.successin10steps.com/?mad=52669 some of the information is available from this eBook.

Be a mentor with a servants heart Ben Drake

Success or failure

20/10/2010

| No Comments

| Mentor Ben Drake

| 11:52 am

Life its interesting some people succeed and others will fail. Why because the ones who fail simply give up before it's their time. Someone else tempts them with a better offer or says oh you are not making any money come and join me and I will help you. I did that once and ages later it feel in my face because of how the person treated others, yet the good part was that there was lessons learnt from such. Sometimes you need to analyse and reset your goals. At other times are you going for the right goal is what you need to ask yourself. Recently during a period of much stress I asked myself a question one which I believe everyone needs to ask themselves. Here is that question....

What would you do... if you were told you only had 24 hours to live?

To me the answer came back quick as anything and I have to keep that answer between myself and those who know that answer, sometimes you may not get a answer that is ok, it may confuse you or it may not be what you thought it would be. To me I received no surprise with my answer; my answer tells me why I continue going and where I am heading. How well it says this is your purpose and I would of never found such without doing a mental cleanse, yet also without the support of some really great friends. Sure it's rough at times, yet there are things I have to do. We each determine our own success or failure by own our actions or words.

When we try and push, bully or bribe someone to do something for us then we are not confident that they are going to say yes. It means that the person is trying to strengthen their own position so that they have a better chance of getting a favourable outcome. I been thinking about my past close relationships today and what happened, some of it was my own fault. Others well it was a combination of things, however these days I enjoy each day more and more. Right now I need to sort out my stuff and go from there, say goodbye to those who make me feel worse, work out what I am taking with me, find a place and just go. There are things that need to be taken no matter what, clothes mostly yet other things are unable to be replaced some things can be.

If you want to learn more about relationships http://bdrake.successin10steps.com/?mad=52669 some of the information is available from this eBook.

Be a mentor with a servants heart Ben Drake

Stress

19/10/2010

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| Mentor Ben Drake

| 11:48 am

Stress it is one of those things that sometimes you do not know if it's built up until you end up falling down. It's a hard thing to manage when you do not know if you are stressed or not for me it's like saying well you have not been taking care of yourself or have been too strong for too long. You are doing too much is another thing it says, so what is best. Working out what causes you the stress and how you react, in a way I need to do such myself just take the time to realise ok I have to rest and take care of myself.

Boundaries

18/10/2010

| No Comments

| Mentor Ben Drake

| 10:12 am

One thing I have been coming to terms with is the good and bad friendships, those that are positive and negative. Also working on understanding others personalities, right now its part of the journey. I guess knowing that I need to deal with a variety of people, some of those people are going to be destructive or toxic and others are going to be supportive and encouraging. For me I have to work on a number of areas. I know some people are not going to appreciate or enjoy such; however they need to understand I am doing this for my own wellbeing not for their own individual happiness. So it's time to establish some firm boundaries, that means saying well this is what I am prepared to accept and not prepared to accept.

I know people will push them, some people will receive less boundaries whist others will receive more a lot more. It's about me saying this is what is acceptable and not acceptable, there are people who I will not have to set these limits with and people who will need them enforced to the letter. They will not be happy however I need to do such for my own individual health. That means that my own personal time and business time must be adhered to by the family no matter what. Emergencies only, it's time to say I am not going to do this for you anymore.

Learning about my family

15/10/2010

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| Mentor Ben Drake

| 12:46 pm

Ok I have been learning so much about myself and my family these last few weeks. Now I understand where all the love came from as a child. There is nothing I can do to go back to that point in time however I was raised how I was raised. Nothing can change such, for me I can only live my life as I know one person would have wanted me to of lived. I grew up with parents who were unable to show their love for others it was what happened. They just could not do it; one was literally incapable of doing such. The other well they would buy you anything you wanted all the latest gadgets, the car whatever. It was who they were. That was part of my family yet I also lived with my grandparents who were the opposite and well great people.

I grew up in a generational family which was interesting as when I was born my great grandparents even lived with us. Now that is part of life, I do not remember those years I was only a baby. Yet I can remember the later years living with my grandparents my grandmother who would do anything for anyone she would sit there listening and was just so loving. It explains the reason why I was reasonable during the years living with my grandparents a loving woman who lived a good life. She was someone you could talk to, there was also my grandfather he was a loving person alone. Having grown up with love having come from my grandmother and as soon as she started becoming worse the love started to fade.

Recently my grandmother passed away after a number of years in the nursing home yet she was not the same person she once was. Yet I when listening at her funeral to my uncle speak of her and how she was it finally made sense of what type of person she was. For me I have been on the adventure and I enjoy such, if you want to learn more about relationships http://bdrake.successin10steps.com/?mad=52669 some of the information is available from this eBook.

Author: Mentor Ben Drake

Who am I?

Success or failure

Stress

Boundaries

Learning about my family