Why I’m Not Afraid to Cry at Work « Positively Positive.
A wonderful post from positively positive on being able to express your own emotions as a person.
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Wow a wonderful post by Dr Tony Alessandra on treating people as you want to be treated as it appeared in Jim Rohn’s newsletter. Some people may not enjoy the way that you treat them or handle them. You have to learn to treat them as they want to be treated as person, this comes back to treating a person as they want to be treated.
Yes there are people out there who will not appreciate your style of leadership, who you are as a person and the way you do things. However its who they are, you have to treat them as they want to be treated as a person.
Respect for Others
by Dr. Tony AlessandraRespect for others goes beyond the Golden Rule. You remember the Golden Rule? Do unto others as you would have others do unto you." It's been around for over 2000 years and still has a solid reputation as a rule to live by. I like to add what I call “The Platinum Rule" which says: “Do unto others as they want to be done unto.” The Platinum Rule helps us to avoid the possible conflicts the Golden Rule could unintentionally set up.
Let me explain. When you treat others as you want to be treated, you can end up offending others who have different needs, wants and expectations from you. Following the Golden Rule verbatim means treating others from your point of view.
That means you naturally tend to speak in the way you are most comfortable listening; or sell the way you like to be sold; or manage the way you like others to direct you.
When you treat people as you seek to be treated, it can cause tension. Why? Because the other person may not like your way. That brings us to the second reason the Golden Rule can actually damage relationships. It implies that all people wanted to be treated the same when, in fact, our preferences are not all alike. So the application of this principle varies from one individual to the next based on their personality differences. Respecting others means learning to treat different people differently, according to their needs, not ours. This leads to greater understanding and acceptance all around.
The trait of “respect for others” can be narrowly interpreted as “live and let live.” That philosophy is giving way to a larger interpretation which breaks down the old "us and them" mentality and leads us to the conclusion that there's only “us.”
From Jim Rohn’s newsletter on the power of treating people as you want to be treated as person.
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The following is from Jim Rohn on Fascination and being fascinated rather than frustrated by something.
Vitamins for the Mind by Jim Rohn
Fascination
Fascination is one step beyond interest. Interested people want to know if it works. Fascinated people want to learn how it works.
Learn how to turn frustration into fascination. You will learn more being fascinated by life than you will by being frustrated by it.
I'm on my way to the airport to catch a plane that leaves in 45 minutes. The traffic is not moving one inch. I am now fascinated - not frustrated, but fascinated. But I must admit: it doesn't work every time.
Develop a childlike fascination with life and people.
“Vitamins for the Mind” is a weekly sampling of original quotes on a specific topic taken from The Treasury of Quotes by Jim Rohn. The burgundy hardbound book with gold-foil lettering is a collection of more than 365 quotes on 60 topics gathered from Jim’s personal journals, seminars and books and spanning more than 40 years. Click here to order “The Treasury of Quotes.”
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The following is from Jim Rohn on the challenge of being a quality leader yourself and being that wonderful inspirational leader. As Jim states you must refine your skills as a leader. You need to show you are a capable leader and grow as a person. So you need to do personal development and become worth more.
The Great Leadership Challenge
by Jim Rohn
If you want to be a leader who attracts quality people, the key is to become a person of quality yourself. Leadership is the ability to attract someone to the gifts, skills, and opportunities you offer as an owner, as a manager, as a parent. What's important in leadership is refining your skills. All great leaders keep working on themselves until they become effective. Here are some specifics:
Learn to be strong but not impolite. It is an extra step you must take to become a powerful, capable leader with a wide range of reach. Some people mistake rudeness for strength. It's not even a good substitute.
Next, learn to be kind but not weak. We must not mistake weakness for kindness. Kindness isn't weak. Kindness is a certain type of strength. We must be kind enough to tell someone the truth. We must be kind enough and considerate enough to lay it on the line. We must be kind enough to tell it like it is and not deal in delusion.
Next, learn to be bold but not a bully. It takes boldness to win the day. To build your influence, you've got to walk in front of your group. You've got to be willing to take the first arrow, tackle the first problem, discover the first sign of trouble. Like the farmer, if you want any rewards at harvest time, you have got to be bold and face the weeds and the rain and the bugs straight on. You've got to seize the moment.
Here's the next step. You've got to learn to be humble but not timid. You can't get to the high life by being timid. Some people mistake timidity for humility. But humility is a virtue; timidity is a disease. It's an affliction. It can be cured, but it is a problem. Humility is almost a God-like word. A sense of awe. A sense of wonder. An awareness of the human soul and spirit. An understanding that there is something unique about the human drama versus the rest of life. Humility is a grasp of the distance between us and the stars, yet having the feeling that we're part of the stars.
Here's a good tip: Learn to be proud but not arrogant. It takes pride to build your ambitions. It takes pride in your community. It takes pride in a cause, in accomplishment. But the key to becoming a good leader is to be proud without being arrogant. Do you know the worst kind of arrogance? Arrogance from ignorance. It's intolerable. If someone is smart and arrogant, we can tolerate that. But if someone is ignorant and arrogant, that's just too much to take.
The next step is learning to develop humor without folly. In leadership, we learn that it's okay to be witty but not silly; fun but not foolish.
Next, deal in realities. Deal in truth. Save yourself the agony of delusion. Just accept life as it is. Life is unique. The whole drama of life is unique. It's fascinating. Life is unique. Leadership is unique. The skills that work well for one leader may not work at all for another. However, the fundamental skills of leadership can be adopted to work well for just about everyone: at work, in the community, and at home.
From Jim Rohn’s newsletter a wonderful article on the skills needed to be a wonderful leader.
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The following is from the Friday edition of the inspire your day. A wonderful story on the power spending time with those who you love most.
Here is your Friday story,
The Christmas Sermon
“’Twas the night before Christmas and…all through the house….’” Yes, it was the night before Christmas (or actually three weeks before) but I was not thinking of Sugar Plums, nor St. Nick, not even any of the reindeer! But near this night before Christmas I was envisioning preparing to speak as an Inspirational Speaker at a church in London --- London, England. I was so excited!
I had just read an e-mail from the church inviting me to speak on Christmas day as their guest speaker. Reading the e-mail from the church, they apologized for the “late notice” but they stated that their original speaker had to cancel due to illness and they “hoped” (I thought possibly they meant to write “prayed” instead of “hoped”) my schedule would be clear to come to London.
So I was to be their “second choice”, but I did not care, as long as I got to speak in London (my first international speaking engagement) --- to share my message of hope on Christmas day, one of the holiest days of the year for Christians.
I was so excited, so honored, and…so puzzled! I quickly asked myself, “Why would a London church…any church…want to hear a Christmas sermon from Me?” See, I am JEWISH!
Quickly, I rationalized, “Of course, of course…now I understand…JESUS WAS JEWISH, TOO! They want a Jew to preach the sermon that was originally preached by a Jew.”
But a second problem came flashing through my mind: Shawn, my daughter, was coming to visit us for the holidays. She works in L.A. and this would be her longest stay in Houston since her college graduation from U.S.C. in California. My time with her would be cut short. But then I again quickly rationalized,” that will still give us plenty of time together. I’ll only be gone for the three days.”
I quickly called my Speakers Bureau, leaving them a message with the exciting news, followed by a quick e-mail forwarding to them the church’s invitation. I breathed in heavily and thought, “WOW, finally I’m going to be an International Speaker.”
So I began practicing my remarks to the church: the importance of home, the importance of faith….
Meanwhile, my Speakers Bureau (as well as my daughter, to whom I had forwarded the invitation) had a few concerns, as there were several misspelled words in the church’s e-mail; however after my Bureau and the church had e-mailed each other my Bureau was less concerned and felt it was very likely a valid engagement. But still, something did not feel “Kosher” to Shawn, to my Bureau, and to me (even though I so badly wanted it to be legit).
My Speakers Bureau “plugged” their phone number into Google. Immediately, scores of fraud reports came across my agent’s computer screen. My agent (who was on the phone with me) softly replied only five words: “This does not look good.”
I was not going to London to speak at a church; nor was I going to speak at any other church on Christmas day. That e-mail was a scam.
I was crushed. I was so disappointed. However, I felt (and feel) "that everyone has disappointments: doing badly on a test when you’ve studied so hard; not making a sale you knew you were going to make; your sport’s team loses even though it was up by so much, with so little time left. Nothing in life is guaranteed.
I feel a key to success is persevering and always “pushing on.”
A goal might not always be obtainable, but that does not mean that one should give up. Yogi Berra once said, “If you come to a fork in the road…pick it up.” I’m sure he was just kidding and meant to say, “If you come to a fork in the road and you choose the wrong one, try another path…and if that’s not successful, try another one….”
Disappointments are part of life. My father tells a story about a high school graduation that actually occurred and that he experienced. It was a “wild” example of a disappointment.
A very wealthy man’s son was graduating and the father purchased for his son a brand new, shiny, red Ford automobile. However, the son was very disappointed with this gift, shouting at his father, “I wanted a Mercedes! Every one of your salesmen you give a Ford, and me, you give the same thing. I’m your son. I deserve something better, something more expensive.”
Sometimes, disappointments are part of life; lessons to make us try harder. Yes, disappointments hurt, but like everything else in life one should always look on the bright side.
You might be asking, “What could possibly be the bright side to the ‘Christmas sermon that wasn’t?” That answer is easy. “I got to spend extra time with my daughter!” And every father will tell you, “That’s no bah humbug!”
©2013 by Michael Jordan Segal, MSW; all rights reserved
Michael Jordan Segal, who defied all odds after being shot in the head, is a husband, father, social worker, works at a level one trauma center giving to patients and families emotional support and hope, freelance author (including a CD/Download of 12 short stories, read with light background music, entitled POSSIBLE, as well as working on his autobiography, which will be entitled A SHOT OF INSPIRATION), and inspirational speaker, sharing his recipe for happiness, recovery and success before conferences and businesses. To contact Mike or to order his CD, please visit www.InspirationByMike.com ;,as well as checking out his youtube @ http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hNeRqpaoNpQ (as well as a new youtube @ www.youtube.com/watch?v=3ZLkyz4KG7A.
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